Disney princess movies often promise that love will solve everything, portraying “happily ever after” as the ultimate goal. While magical on the surface, these stories create unrealistic expectations about relationships, especially for vulnerable teens navigating their first romances.
Many students have their first relationship in high school, believing this is their chance to experience perfect love for the first time. “I always thought I was gonna get the prince and princess thing, or a knight in shining armor that’s gonna come save me from the tower,” senior Giselle Martinez Landa said.
In a time where our childhood is often overwhelmed with media like Disney, we inevitably pick up influences from it, especially in stories about love. Early Disney movies depict relationships as flawless and effortless, as though there aren’t any obstacles.
“It’s almost like Disney is giving credence to the idea of a meet-cute where your eyes lock across the room, and then all of a sudden, you fall in love, and everything’s going to be perfect. In reality, it doesn’t work that way,” relationship scientist Marisa Cohen said. Relationships involve disagreement and require effort and trust, something Disney fails to show its audience.
This idea sets teens up for disappointment when they enter their first relationship and expect a fairytale. “Disney goes overboard with the expectations, it seems perfect, but it’s obviously not,” junior Caden Lewis said. Lewis has been in a relationship for over two years and has developed more realistic expectations, including the need for mutual trust and alone time, and understanding that some ideas, like the male savior trope, are unrealistic.
In a good relationship, there would be true acknowledgment of the other person’s feelings. It would be easy to talk to your partner when they mess up, easy to talk it out, and every small mistake would not be a dealbreaker but instead an opportunity to grow. These early movies never managed to grasp the concept of growth within the relationship, instead, they disregarded the need to grow as a person and showed dependence on your partner to find who you are. This is especially present in movies such as Snow White and Cinderella when the prince saves the princess from challenges and their love seems perfect. Disney has recently begun creating more diverse stories, like Moana, but many old tales remain extremely popular.
Relationships involve navigating conflict, finding a middle ground, and accepting your differences. “In Disney movies, the guy is always perfected to match the girl’s personality, but that’s not how realistic relationships would work,” junior Evie Filipek said.
“There’s this belief that everyone has this one perfect match, a soulmate that’s out there for you and you need to overcome all of these obstacles to be with that person, but love doesn’t quite work that way. Love is something that you’re continually working for with your partner over time,” Cohen continued.
Disney movies also describe love as a path to self-discovery, often portraying the princess as dependent on the prince to save her, creating a power imbalance in their relationship. “The knight in shining armor situation isn’t giving enough credit to the autonomy and the strength of the women in these relationships,” Cohen said.
The truth is, most people won’t easily find a prince to rescue them or experience the princess lifestyle. That doesn’t mean happiness is unattainable—it just requires more realistic expectations. Instead of looking for a fairytale, individuals should aim for relationships built on mutual respect, independence, and effort and look for films that portray more complex characters and stories.
