“Patriarchy,” a term once confined to academic spaces, has recently entered popular media from the blockbuster Barbie movie to Taylor Swift lyrics.
Traditionally, the term refers to a familial or societal structure in which fathers or male figures hold ultimate power. Today, it more generally describes a society controlled by and favorable towards men. This system subjugates women while simultaneously upholding traditional standards of masculinity to create a hierarchy where men compete to be the most “manly.”
While the patriarchy obviously hurts women, the system’s harmful impacts on men are too often overlooked. Dismantling the patriarchy not only limits the oppression of women but also helps men forge meaningful relationships, expand their options in the workplace, and adapt to our evolving society.
Dismantling the patriarchy not only limits the oppression of women but also helps men forge meaningful relationships, expand their options in the workplace, and adapt to our evolving society.
It’s unhealthy and unethical for anyone to desire a system that oppresses others, whether that system benefits them or not. Even if the patriarchy did not directly disservice men, we as men still ought to use empathy and should want to help women attain equality.
But upholding the patriarchy can also be self-destructive. The patriarchy imposes a traditional view of masculinity that forces men to constantly hold back their emotions and conform to stereotypes of what a man “should” be. While there isn’t anything inherently wrong with men consciously choosing traditionally masculine forms of self-expression, this narrow expectation of masculinity stifles men’s ability to express themselves and their feelings, resulting in adverse effects on their physical and mental well-being.
Over the past couple of decades, men’s mental health has consistently deteriorated. In 2021, men died by suicide almost four times more than women. Plus, men are less likely than women to reach out for mental health support due to stigma surrounding the topic.
Wizdom Powell, a men’s health expert and former White House Fellow, said, “Contrary to the idea that men should suppress their emotions and ‘take it like a man,’ most research suggests that the rigid prescription of masculinity that tells men to be strong and stoic is perhaps the most harmful thing to men’s health. In addition to being linked to poor cardiovascular outcomes, ignoring your emotions is like a constant game of whack-a-mole, and it isn’t good for anyone.”
Removing the rigid standards imposed by the patriarchy also removes burdens placed on both men and women; sharing responsibilities and removing traditional gender roles lifts the pressure for men to be the ones who must do specific tasks. Yes, our world has made large strides toward inclusivity and acceptance, but today’s society is nowhere near where it needs to be. And, it is not just men who continue to hold up patriarchal standards, but women as well. For example, most American women still expect men to be breadwinners in heterosexual relationships, according to Georgetown University.
Powell said, “This extremism surrounding masculinity suggests that we’re playing a zero-sum game: that for men to grow and thrive in the world, they have to be at the top of a hierarchy which forces the promotion of maleness in return for ultimate power.”
The impacts are even worse for men who express themselves in non-traditionally masculine ways, as they are immediately placed at the bottom of the male hierarchy. According to the Harvard Business Review, “Men are more likely to be harassed when they work in male-dominated jobs and are perceived as too feminine. Research also finds that men who ask for family leave, something that was historically in the purview of women, are viewed as poorer workers and are less recommended for rewards, compared to female counterparts.”
This extremism surrounding masculinity suggests that we’re playing a zero-sum game: that for men to grow and thrive in the world, they have to be at the top of a hierarchy which forces the promotion of maleness in return for ultimate power.
Wizdom Powell
These narrow definitions of manhood discourage men from taking on the role of a caretaker: only 26% of HEAL (health, education, administration, and literacy) positions are held by men. Fewer than 3% of American kindergarten teachers are male and only 22% of today’s psychologists are male. These professions that people often associate with traditionally feminine traits like empathy and gentleness are unappealing to men because they go against traditional standards of masculinity, even though men could succeed in these fields.
Part of this can be blamed on gendered stereotypes in the media’s portrayal of particular occupations, as well as the lack of representation of gender diversity within occupational fields. While some think that low salaries deter men from these jobs, men who work in female-dominated jobs tend to be paid far more than women.
Pressures to live up to the expectations of masculinity can even discourage fathers from playing with and being emotionally available for their kids, which has many negative effects on a child’s development.
Some claim that movements for female empowerment lead to a loss of power that negatively impacts men; an article from King’s College reported, “One in six of the UK public overall believes that in 20 years’ time it will be harder to be a man than a woman.”
Perhaps these societal shifts have left the identities of men who desire to cling to rigid standards adrift, but part of the male mental health crisis is a result of men’s resistance to these movements and their failure to adapt, not the movements themselves. Men who cling to traditional gender roles are going to inevitably see women’s empowerment as a threat to their own way of life, whereas men who adapt will see women as partners to collaborate with instead of competitors and inferiors.
Men who cling to traditional gender roles are going to inevitably see women’s empowerment as a threat to their own way of life, whereas men who adapt will see women as partners to collaborate with instead of competitors and inferiors.
When some men perceive women’s empowerment as a threat to their conventional roles, they may align themselves with extremist traditionalist influencers like Andrew Tate, who, instead of advising vulnerable men to seek help, further pushes them down pipelines that cultivate insecurity and competition. Paradoxically, this alignment is often perceived as unattractive by women, leading to a decrease in social interaction between the two genders. These men may feel even more isolated and turn to more extreme ideologies, perpetuating a cycle of loneliness. Single men are also less likely than single women to connect with friends of the same gender due to being taught that it isn’t “manly” to connect with friends, thus causing men to be far more lonely than women.
Though certain men are able to exploit the patriarchy to gain power, the system hurts the majority of men far more than it benefits them. Acknowledging this is critical to moving past an outdated system, uniting people across gender identities, and improving men’s mental health. Dismantling the patriarchy is not just a women’s issue.
